What Would It Be Like To Belong?
by TheSpazChik
Summary: After being rejected by the Vulcan Science Academy, Amaya Waterson is assigned to Starfleet where she meets two boys and their fathers and gets swept up in a love triangle loaded with testasterone all while trying to gain the exprience and knowlege she was deprived of when her Vulcan father died, leaving her to be raised on Earth.


**sorry if somethings are incorrect, i just recently got into Star Trek and havent seen any of the episodes and iv done alot of research so please tell me if i got something wrong but please dont bitch about, please be nice, i dont want to fight with anyone. anyway enjoy:)**

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"What brings you to us today?"

"I wish to be accepted into the Vulcan Science Academy." I answered.

"Your Vulcan father perished in the destruction of the first Vulcan planet, correct?"

"Affirmative." I replied, keeping my composure.

"He did an exceptionally well when he attended the academy. Do you believe you can do the same?"

"I have studied since my childhood. If given the chance, I might gain the skill to emulate my father."

"You were not born on either Vulcan planets." He said almost accusingly, like I did something wrong." Why try so hard to join our customs?"

"I have gained a great amount of knowledge of the Vulcan species. Being half Vulcan, it is only logical that I want to further my intellect by gaining the knowledge that I do not know."

"Knowledge?"

"The experience of contact, and communication. To live, converse amongst others of my kind."

He appeared to be thinking it over and quietly talked to the others. I glanced back and forth to meet each and everyone's eyes that were present.

"You are an intelligent girl. However…." He said slowly before trailing off.

"Yes sir?"

"You have not gone through the traditional rites of passage. Such as fending for yourself for an amount of time or bonding with another male Vulcan at a younger age."

My fists clenched behind my back as I kept my face emotionless.

"Your conclusion, sir?"

"You would not do well in this environment. You have not been taught since infancy the philosophy. The four months you have spent here have shown that you are too emotional for our ways, no matter how you act in our presence. Logically, we cannot accept you. Not while we are rebuild our endangered race. We want things to stay peaceful here on the new Vulcan."

"Of course, we must do what is best for the planet Spock Prime so fortunately found, it would be illogical to cause conflict whilst we are just beginning to settle in."

"When Spock stood before us, he chose Starfleet over the academy, perhaps you might consider becoming a cadet for the USS Enterprise. For a young woman of your intellect, your disadvantage would not as likely get in the way. Spock Prime is your mentor, correct?

"Yes."

"Speak with him."

"I understand." I nodded to them and left into the hall to find Spock Prime waiting.

I tried to keep up the appearance but like the Elder said; I was not raised to put everything behind logic. I was raised on Earth by my human mother, so emotions were not new to me.

"What ails you?" He asked putting a comforting arm around my shoulders and led me down the hall.

"They could have at least acted like it was a hard decision." I sighed.

"Your were not considered?"

"They said that now wasnt a good time. They basically told me that i wasnt good for the planet. Not one Vulcan here, accept you, hasnt looked down on me for living on Earth since birth. If I was atleast given a chance I might be able to learn the ways you can only learn with experience."

"Anything else?"

"Yea, they told me that I should join Starfleet and speak to you about how my "Disadvantage" wont get in the way of that. To the humans Im Vulcan, but to the Vulcans I will always just be a human with Pointy ears and slainted eyebrows. But now I feel like neither."

"None of that matters." He said assuringly."You will always be Amaya. Never forget that."

I looked up at him with watery eyes.

"Ever heard of the Kobeyashimaru test?" He asked.

"Yes. Your...young Spock has been the programmer for the last 22 years."

"Ever considered the position?"

"Once or twice, yes."

"Starfleet might be better for you."

"Are you sure?"

"Enough of putting up a facade infront of the Elders, be yourself."

"You're right." I replied, still dissapointed." Anways, if I have to say or hear the word "Logical"I think I might scream."

He chuckled.

:.:.:.:

As i stepped out of the carrier ship, my mother ran up to hug me.

"Hi, mom." I said hugging her back.

"Oh Sweetie, i missed you so much!"

When we broke apart she looked with hopeful eyes and we began walking to her car.

"How'd it go? Were you accepted?"

"No, according to them im too human and it would only cause conflict if I were to be fully accepted into their society."

"Oh pish! Forget them!" She assured." I remember when your father was around another Vulcan he insisted to act as you do; cool, calm, and collected. But, once we were alone he was more human than most fullblooded humans. Considering he was fullblooded Vulcan amazed me and I cherished that he trusted me enough to show that side. That not all Vulcans look into danger, or love, or fear with a blank face."

I smiled at the dreamy look on her face. She really loved dad and he loved her. And that was something I wished for. Someone who is prepared for a million question, uncontrolable laughter, my family, my happy and sad tears, and useless arguments. Someone with emotions.

I though the Vulcan could give me that. Before the philosophy of Logic, Vulcans were emotional and violent creatures. Though they keep themselves totally calm, basing everything on logic, it is said that emotions run deeper in Vulcans than even humans. But I could never just push back the need to laugh, or yell, or cry. I was raised to voice them.

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**i really hope this catches your attention, readers and i hope you like it. Please review or alert and tell me what you think:)**

**TheSpazChik**


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